Shortly after the completion of my 30 day challenge, Brett and I embarked on a new challenge together: 30 days of Vegetarian Living. Since I have a proclivity for following a diet low in animal protein anyway I did not think this would be much of a feat for me. With Brett, I was not so sure considering he does tend to enjoy steak a fair bit.
We are now on the 25th day and I am realizing that for the past two months I have treated myself as a human test tube. I went from a stringent yoga regimen to maintaining an extremely high level of activity but removing “the souls of deceased animals” from my diet. As I mentioned, I don’t eat much meat at all—but upon removing it completely I came to realize that chicken and fish prove to be quiet a necessary part of my diet and help facilitate my lifestyle and energy level.
I’m not political about vegetarianism at all, but I do subscribe to a belief that local sustainability and free range farming is important. Being the over-thinker that I am, I don’t condone large scale farming and think it can be inhumane, of dubious quality as well as unhealthy.
In an ideal world, I would be an herbivore. Of this, I am certain. Throughout Brett and my challenge I’ve had the opportunity to experience a whole pantheon of foods I’ve never eaten with any amount of regularity. Suddenly, my diet became rife with quinoa, kale, spelt, seitan and tempeh to name a few. The trouble I find is that to adequately devote oneself to this lifestyle, one must dedicate an extraordinary amount of time to educating themselves on alternative protein sources as well as have the drive to be creative in the kitchen.
I’ve had the good fortune of wandering over to PCC (a posh, marginally over-priced Seattle area co-op) during my lunch hour and loading up on the ultra-healthy goodies from their expansive deli but dinner isn’t quite as easy. After a long work day and 90 minutes of yoga, time is money (so to speak). We haven’t had the chance to study the vegan and vegetarian cookbooks I’ve procured over my formative years of being a macrobiote and vegan, so we stick to what we know: pasta dishes, stir-fry, veggie burgers, beans and rice, soups and salads. This is fine and dandy, but after having hit up some really cool vegetarian restaurants in the Seattle area over the past few weeks—I just wish there were more hours in the day.
I’m learning that everything we do in life is a challenge of sorts. I’ve told Brett that I would like this to be the year of “30 day challenges” because once you devote yourself so wholeheartedly to something for a month it gets you to thinking. I’ve become keenly aware not only of my strengths, but of my weaknesses as well. I feel like I’m building character, if only the slightest bit. I am continually forced to evaluate closely what’s important to me and what I can let slide. Ultimately, balance again comes to mind. And achieving that just might be the greatest challenge of all.
3.25.2010
3.15.2010
Too much of a good thing...
To say that I lost my direction post-challenge would be an understatement. I sank into a mild depression—losing my focus and questioning my purpose. I couldn’t understand what had happened…I initially wouldn’t have thought that endeavoring to do something so good for me would have such a severe impact once I had finished.
There is definitely something to be said for a purpose driven life and I began to question exactly what that meant to me once I had completed my stringent 30 days of Bikram yoga. No matter whether I had been festooned with exhaustion or ready and rearing for my practice—I knew what had to be done. Every day I nourished and hydrated myself in preparation for the evening. Every morning I diligently recounted my experience through prose and illustration. Once that was over, I wasn’t sure what to do. I continued going to practice, but my life wasn’t the same. I deflated.
Even documentation of my shenanigans (of which there were plenty) seemed trivial and banal so I began to question whether I had achieved enlightenment or if I were just plain burned out. As I discovered last week, it was simply a matter of being exhausted beyond all comprehension. My yoga classes became arduous and though I came to recognize that not every day would hold a strong practice, each day my strength continued to wane until I thought perhaps the jig was up.
Being of firm resolve and ridiculous perseverance, I would not relent and therefore continued my daily routine and added some socializing into the mix. No longer was I serene and yogi but rather exhausted, maladjusted and irritated by the most minor of trivialities. Something had to give… so on Wednesday of last week I took a much needed mental health day in an effort to relax. I hoped to cease lambasting myself for not being stringent and fettered with activity every waking moment. Instead, I wanted to allow myself to enjoy the decompressing that ensued. To be honest, at first I had grandiose illusions of popping over to a neighborhood French bakery, cleaning the house, going to the market and running but my body had other plans in store. After 20 minutes of reading after breakfast, I drifted gently off to sleep for four glorious hours.
I slowly acquiesced to my body’s needs and realized what my new purpose must be: to strive for balance. I understand that I can’t always be all things to all people and that at some point after stuffing my social calendar to the gills I’m going to burst. Yes, I understand this clearly. But what I need to be able to do is accept and know that it’s okay to take some time for myself as well—to rest, to rejuvenate. Sometimes it would seem that my purpose would be to just simply to be.
There is definitely something to be said for a purpose driven life and I began to question exactly what that meant to me once I had completed my stringent 30 days of Bikram yoga. No matter whether I had been festooned with exhaustion or ready and rearing for my practice—I knew what had to be done. Every day I nourished and hydrated myself in preparation for the evening. Every morning I diligently recounted my experience through prose and illustration. Once that was over, I wasn’t sure what to do. I continued going to practice, but my life wasn’t the same. I deflated.
Even documentation of my shenanigans (of which there were plenty) seemed trivial and banal so I began to question whether I had achieved enlightenment or if I were just plain burned out. As I discovered last week, it was simply a matter of being exhausted beyond all comprehension. My yoga classes became arduous and though I came to recognize that not every day would hold a strong practice, each day my strength continued to wane until I thought perhaps the jig was up.
Being of firm resolve and ridiculous perseverance, I would not relent and therefore continued my daily routine and added some socializing into the mix. No longer was I serene and yogi but rather exhausted, maladjusted and irritated by the most minor of trivialities. Something had to give… so on Wednesday of last week I took a much needed mental health day in an effort to relax. I hoped to cease lambasting myself for not being stringent and fettered with activity every waking moment. Instead, I wanted to allow myself to enjoy the decompressing that ensued. To be honest, at first I had grandiose illusions of popping over to a neighborhood French bakery, cleaning the house, going to the market and running but my body had other plans in store. After 20 minutes of reading after breakfast, I drifted gently off to sleep for four glorious hours.
I slowly acquiesced to my body’s needs and realized what my new purpose must be: to strive for balance. I understand that I can’t always be all things to all people and that at some point after stuffing my social calendar to the gills I’m going to burst. Yes, I understand this clearly. But what I need to be able to do is accept and know that it’s okay to take some time for myself as well—to rest, to rejuvenate. Sometimes it would seem that my purpose would be to just simply to be.
3.03.2010
30 Day Challenge! I'm a star!
The Final Day- February 25th, 2009
I collapsed in tears after finally having made it to my car. I just wasn’t sure what to think or feel once it was over, but there it was: Mission Accomplished. The biggest box of them all was finally ticked off and time kept marching on.
I was an emotionally drained train wreck because class wasn’t what I had expected it to be on my final day—not that I should have expected fireworks to shoot out my bum or a lotus blossom to lift me up into the sky….as a matter of fact, I know I shouldn’t have expected anything. This was a challenge I set out to do upon my own volition for no other reason than to prove I could do it and see what happened as a result.
Every day was a new test, intercalary to the greater 30 day challenge to which I had subjected myself. Every day—a little lesson learned.
The most popular question that I have fielded throughout this experience is “So how do you feel?” Depending upon the day, my answer would change. The common current throughout has always been that I feel more centered, focused, calm and content. On some days my responses would be laced with annoyance, on others, exhaustion; but I always sensed that I was doing something “Good” even though I wasn’t always able to pinpoint exactly what or why that was.
There were a few days nearing the end of my challenge that seemed to be imbued with a severe case of senioritis, while on other days I would faithfully hold vigil to the quietly flickering candle of my energy and perseverance—lest they burn out. As a result of this, perhaps one of the greatest lessons I have come to appreciate is that every day is different and I should never hold any expectations about what it may or may not be. I must simply accept that fact and be grateful that I have the opportunity to experience what may come.
This is my journey. More so than anything else, I have learned to be humble both on my yoga mat and in life. Almost every day I fondly regard a proverb that hangs in my studio’s lobby: “Be humble, for you are made of dung. Be noble, for you are made of stars.” I am a tiny bleating constellation in a seemingly endless galaxy of stars. All I can do is put every ounce of myself into the universe and hope that I receive a little bit in return.
I collapsed in tears after finally having made it to my car. I just wasn’t sure what to think or feel once it was over, but there it was: Mission Accomplished. The biggest box of them all was finally ticked off and time kept marching on.
I was an emotionally drained train wreck because class wasn’t what I had expected it to be on my final day—not that I should have expected fireworks to shoot out my bum or a lotus blossom to lift me up into the sky….as a matter of fact, I know I shouldn’t have expected anything. This was a challenge I set out to do upon my own volition for no other reason than to prove I could do it and see what happened as a result.
Every day was a new test, intercalary to the greater 30 day challenge to which I had subjected myself. Every day—a little lesson learned.
The most popular question that I have fielded throughout this experience is “So how do you feel?” Depending upon the day, my answer would change. The common current throughout has always been that I feel more centered, focused, calm and content. On some days my responses would be laced with annoyance, on others, exhaustion; but I always sensed that I was doing something “Good” even though I wasn’t always able to pinpoint exactly what or why that was.
There were a few days nearing the end of my challenge that seemed to be imbued with a severe case of senioritis, while on other days I would faithfully hold vigil to the quietly flickering candle of my energy and perseverance—lest they burn out. As a result of this, perhaps one of the greatest lessons I have come to appreciate is that every day is different and I should never hold any expectations about what it may or may not be. I must simply accept that fact and be grateful that I have the opportunity to experience what may come.
This is my journey. More so than anything else, I have learned to be humble both on my yoga mat and in life. Almost every day I fondly regard a proverb that hangs in my studio’s lobby: “Be humble, for you are made of dung. Be noble, for you are made of stars.” I am a tiny bleating constellation in a seemingly endless galaxy of stars. All I can do is put every ounce of myself into the universe and hope that I receive a little bit in return.
3.01.2010
30 Day Challenge- The final day
Stay tuned for a recapitulation of Thursday, February 25th....I know not yet whether it will be insightful, poetic, or a simple blow by blow.
In the mean time...please enjoy a photo of me and Quatchi- my dado's celebratory gift for having completed the challenge.
In the mean time...please enjoy a photo of me and Quatchi- my dado's celebratory gift for having completed the challenge.
I made it!
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